A Reasonable Doubt

While in various times of my life I may have self-identified as Christian, I was not an avid churchgoer. Over time, I came to label myself "agnostic" which I saw as a third path. Agnosticism is appealing as it appears to be not entirely accepting religious dogma, while not denying God in any way.

As one can see in my previous religion post, I once described religion as something effectively inert and the warts attributed to religion would merely surface elsewhere in society if it were removed.

I thought atheism relied on just as much faith (i.e. "faitheism") in scientific discovery that the religious have in their doctrines. I believed that the onus was on the atheists to inarguably prove that there was no God - at which point I could release my grip on God. I saw religion as just another silly thing people do, and does not deserve any special criticism.

I was wrong.

Yes, religion isn't the only thing messed up in the world. It simply embodies what it is to be completely messed up.

Why religion is different

Religion is far away from a simple preference in automobiles. It is free from any true comparables in our experience.

Religion is unique in the following areas:
  • High stakes
    If your choice (if you were even faced with choice) of religion is wrong, then you could be eternally condemned. After you've subscribed to a religion, if said religion is shown to be false, it may mean that many of your choices in life could have been baseless. Religious dress codes and dietary requirements, for example, would have near zero practical value outside of the religious context.

    This high stakes game ensures people will defend their God of choice as much as they can. This is done both to score points with God as well as defend their lifestyle choices which would have otherwise been seen as frivolous if not masochistic.

  • Incorporation of the Supernatural
    Religion circles around concepts that exist outside any tangible aspect of our daily life. Religion discusses the afterlife, the creation of the universe and ultimately the final resting place of one's soul.

    Since God resides outside our existence, he somehow does not need to answer to contemporary concepts of morality. God, for example, can effectively say "nigger" without his actions being judged by man.

  • No evidence
    Absolutely zero empirical evidence exists that defends any theistic religions. The evidence presented by many religions relies on "holes in science", that is things not yet entirely understood.

    For example, take the beginnings of the universe. Science does not know the whole story at this point. Creationists use this to their advantage, to underline what we don't know, and attribute the work to God.

    This, of course, does not even remotely suffice as evidence to defend any belief and is a logical error so criminal that it is a permanent black mark on our reasoning abilities that this argument is constantly reiterated.

  • Exclusive and divisive
    People are able to like numerous brands of automobile at the same time.

    But in the case of religion, it is very rare to find religious dogma that is compatible with one another. You can't be a Christian Muslim Hindu.

    Religions are not only incompatible, but they often disagree on so many issues that often adherents simply can't live together.

    For example, imagine one religion thought cows were sacred and should never be killed (something akin to Hinduism) while the other thought beef was incredibly awesome and more slaghterhouses needed to be built to meet increasing demand (everybody else). How could these religions exist in the same neighbourhood?


Everybody hates atheists
Atheists are the final minority within the United States to actually gain broad acceptance. And there is data to back this up. A recent poll showed that people in the United States would rather vote for a black person, a Mormon, or a homosexual than an atheist.

Why does nobody like atheists? It is a mystery.

One could claim that the hatred of atheism comes from the fact their beliefs collide with that of a theist. Either the theist is right, or the atheist is right. The beliefs would inevitably lead to argument instead of agreement.

This case does not make sense, however, when it is easily seen that the religious themselves hold conflicting beliefs. A Christian would not agree with a Muslim, Jew, etc.

But it somehow plays out that Christians and Muslims scratch each other's backs while coming together to denounce atheism. We see this in writings spewing such appeasement such as "Islam is a religion of peace" from the Christian camp or "Jesus was a prophet" from the Muslim camp.

While an atheist has more in common with both the Christian (No Allah) and the Muslim (No Yahweh) it somehow does not translate with better relations with either.

It is obvious that no atheist has ever blown themselves up outside a cafe or flown a plane into a skyscraper because there is no God. It's just absurd to even envision an atheist committing a religiously inspired terrorist attack - so why do so many people still fear atheism?

It seems that the advertised idea of an atheist in the western world is the Nietschze-inspired strawman. That is, the religious like to think of an atheist as someone preoccupied with philosophical matters that would shout "God is dead!" from the rooftops, before spiraling into mental breakdown and depression. An absurd portrayal of an atheist, of course, but it is highly unlikely any members of the congregation would have read enough works of atheist philosphers to object to this view.

After attaching the negative stigma associated with Frederich Nietschze and Joseph Stalin, it is child's play to demonize the viewpoint of the atheist. Atheists are portrayed as souless, immoral, uncompassionate, ignorant retards with no understanding of the spirit. Atheists supposedly worship science and hold a dull, evidence-based pragmatic view of the world that makes them incapable of art or feeling.

The charade continues around the world, to prevent apostasy.

While religion spreading lies and libel is nothing new, the propaganda machine is a force to be reckoned with. One need only look up the definition of 'Philistine' to see how effectively religion can bury reputation.

Remember: You're an Atheist Already.
In a sense, at least. Relgious or not, you don't believe in far more gods than you do believe in. Therefore you already know what it feels like to be an atheist.

Not believing in Thor, Poseidon, Zeus, Apollo or Helios seemingly does not make you an immoral person.

Our ancestors were likely converts from polytheism or complete atheism. How many Christians were there in the world before 0 CE?

Were there no decent people on the Earth before Jesus and Mohammed? While chewing on these questions, let's continue.

The Four Felonies

Religion has been criminally wrong about morality, death, sex, and history.

Morality

A dictionary inspired definition of morality would be "A system of ideas of right and wrong conduct".

Religion would like us to believe our sense of morality comes from a supreme being. Further, religion pushes the idea that the moral code outlined in their scriptures and dogma is what the world ought to live by.

Reality is that a sense of morality is within all of us. If humans were not on some level kind, moral people, then civilization wouldn't have made it this far.

The Bible - Could it be more insane?

The best argument against Christianity may be the Bible itself.

The Brick Testament does a very good job of highlighting just how ridiculous the Bible is. This will be a brief overview of just how screwed up it is.

Banned in the Bible:
  • Homosexuality
    Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

  • Shaving
    Leviticus 19:27 Ye shall not round the corners of your heads, neither shalt thou mar the corners of thy beard.

  • Tattoos
    Leviticus 19:28 Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD.

  • Seafood
    Leviticus 11:10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
    Leviticus 11:11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.
    Leviticus 11:12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

  • Polyester
    Leviticus 19:19 Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind: thou shalt not sow thy field with mingled seed: neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee.

  • Working on Saturday (Or is it Sunday?)
    Leviticus 19:30 Ye shall keep my sabbaths, and reverence my sanctuary: I am the LORD.

  • Uncircumcized Men
    Genesis 17:12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which is not of thy seed.
    Genesis 17:14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.
    Jeremiah 4:4 Circumcise yourselves to the LORD, and take away the foreskins of your heart, ye men of Judah and inhabitants of Jerusalem: lest my fury come forth like fire, and burn that none can quench it, because of the evil of your doings.
    Jeremiah 9:25 Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will punish all them which are circumcised with the uncircumcised
    Ezekiel 28:10 Thou shalt die the deaths of the uncircumcised by the hand of strangers: for I have spoken it, saith the Lord GOD.
    ... and many more similar quotes.

  • Planning
    Matthew 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

  • Saving Money
    Matthew 6:19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:
    Matthew 6:20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal

  • Wealth
    Mark 10:21 Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.
    Mark 10:22 And he was sad at that saying, and went away grieved: for he had great possessions.
    Mark 10:23 And Jesus looked round about, and saith unto his disciples, How hardly shall they that have riches enter into the kingdom of God!
    Mark 10:24 And the disciples were astonished at his words. But Jesus answereth again, and saith unto them, Children, how hard is it for them that trust in riches to enter into the kingdom of God!
    Mark 10:25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

  • Marrying a divorced woman
    Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

  • Sexual Urges
    Matthew 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Meanwhile, God promotes slavery.

War on Sin
A vice could be simply described as any activity just plain wrong. A virtue could be described as the opposite - the righteous activity.

What is considered a vice and a virtue is largely subjective. For example stating that faith is a virtue or that homosexuality is a vice will undoutably start an argument with numerous people.

When a religion regards what it sees as a vice in such a negative light, it uses the word sin to describe it.

You may already be aware that the sin of sodomy is illegal in many countries, but did you know that it is also illegal to criticize God?

What ought to define a crime is its impact on others and society as a whole. The problem with using the idea of sin as the basis for what is illegal is that many sins are completely subjective, arbitrary and victimless.

We can see how the war on sin has influenced our world in the days of prohibition and the everlasting war on drugs.

Religious groups want to incarcerate those that would drink, smoke up, or do anything they view as sexually deviant.

The justice goals of religious groups are as attainable as banning vices such as pessimism, apathy and avarice. Yet they are often top priorities for our policing resources, as well as ballooning the incomes of those that would participate in such actions.

Given the wages of a hooker or a drug trafficker, is it a mystery why people find such work appealing?

Instead of relating to our nature to learn by discovery - to actually learn something after collosally screwing up - religious groups would rather faults in character simply be illegal.

One does not need to imagine much to see the endgame for those that use this kind of reasoning - a patriarchal theocracy.

A Father in the clouds, a Big Brother in Government.

Death

Afterlife Attachments

One thing that any apostate has to grapple with is the concept of an afterlife. Obviously eternal salvation sounds very appealing, as does the idea that your loved ones are in heaven and not "just dead".

However, when applying a little bit of thought, it becomes abundantly clear that it is preferable that your friends are simply dead instead of possibly being in Hell. Hell, as discussed earlier, must exist in the Christian framework as it is one of the major selling points of the belief system.

The problem with afterlife goes beyond how much "just dead" is a better alternative.

The afterlife idea cheapens the life we're living. As time approaches infinity, the motivation to do anything within the next 70 years approaches zero. Life as it is can be viewed as an intermediary, which rips out reason to much of anything other than ensure that the path to the next life is clear.

But you don't have to believe me. Simply read the news to see evidence that widespread belief in the afterlife has serious negative consequences*.

* - God actually supports these acts, in Judges 16:22-30.

Eternal Ennui

Many people wonder, "What happens after we die?". If you google it it becomes an apparent that religion has carpet bombed this question.

But a more insightful view was written by Albert Schopenhauer:
If, in everyday life, you are asked about continued existence after death by one of those people who would like to know everything but refuse to learn anything, the most appropriate and approximately correct reply is: 'After your death you will be what you were before your birth.' For this answer implies that is preposterous to demand that a species of existence which had a beginning should not have an end; in addition, however, it contains a hint that there may be two kinds of existence and, correspondingly, two kinds of nothingness.
The religious reconciliation of the fact that you can't remember the days before you were born (or even your existence in the womb, for that matter) could be that since you were always a part of "God's plan" you were spending time with him before your birth. Even if it was the case, it does not patch up the remaining hole that is that there is absolutely linking our conciousness with any supernatural existence. You may as well be a completely different person, culpable for completely different actions.
You might, however, also reply: 'Whatever you will be after your death - even though it were nothing - will then be just as natural and suitable to you as your individual organic existence is now: this the most you have to fear is the moment of transition.
Here we hit on the concept of fear. Religion thought depends on fear. Fear of death, fear of God. Fear is the mindkiller.

He continues...
'Indeed, since mature consideration of the matter leads to the conclusion that total non-being would be preferable to such an existence as ours is, the idea of the cessation of our existence or of a time in which we no longer are, can from a rational point of view trouble us as little as the idea that we had never been. Now since this existence is essentially a personal one, the ending of the personality cannot be regarded as a loss.'

To see that the assertion that non-being is preferable to being, is how you do not weep for all those that don't exist. Everyday you have the ability to create life in some way, and if life is absolutely better than non-being then this choice would be a no-brainer.

But, since you do not force sex with others or force others to have sex you do not seem to be concerned with those that could be. Even when you could say that practicality prevents you from doing this, you are ill-concerned with those that could be as this would cause an unheard of level of emotional distress.

You are more concerned with keeping the life you have, even though it's obvious you accept that never being born would make one inescapably break-even on the universal scale. Since beings that do not yearn for survival wouldn't have lived this long, it is natural to have some in-grained predispostition towards staying alive.

This does not mean, that you have any rational basis to fear death and the non-being associated with it.

The Atheist Funeral
Those brought up in religious societies (including myself) are often perplexed by what life could be like without religion. Birth, death, and every Sunday inbetween is filled by the church.

It isn't hard for those with any imagination, however, to build a world without religion. As with anything, it is hard for people to break from the status quo.

As consoling as people believe religious thought to be, the pious still weep at funerals. Somehow, nothing about a celibate pervert you don't know reiterating that a loved one is "with God" as a fade in to the millionth time you've heard Amazing Grace relieves the atmosphere of grief. If we honestly, truly believed the words of the clergy, we'd be dancing in the funeral home as the person had finally acheived the eternal salvation goal we all hope to reach.

Perhaps we think our loved one perhaps descended into Hell? Or perhaps we weep selfishly for our own loss, which somehow overshadows the accepted gain the dead has received.

The appeal of an atheist funeral is that it provides the possiblity of being uniquely tailored for the individual. Let's face it - Amazing Grace is not on our favorite tunes playlist. Why will it be played at your funeral? Why is some dude you've never met going to do the most talking?

The traditional funeral procession does not honour the dead as much as it honours tradition, institution and uniformity.

Be unique. Die different.

Sex

Teenage Pregnancy
To add a footnote on the zero-sum game we seem to be playing with religion is the entire concept of abstinence.

Churches often preach abstinence under the banner of sex education. How discussing a single option to a question giving dozens of answers qualifies as education instead of blatant fraud is yet to be determined. Churches acting in this regard are lying, deceitful machines of ignorance that should be jailed.

But the situation is far worse than that. Enter the story of Onan, which has been seen as a condemnation of contraception as well as mastrubation. It is no wonder that churches don't like contraception or mastrubation. (Which is hilarious, as mastrubation is the only option that one could use to be celibate)

One has to truly wonder why premarital sex is condemned by all churches. What is wrong about premarital sex? Absolutely nothing. Yet God has some hangups - God seems preoccupied with immaculately clean vaginas.

Abrahamic religious tradition promotes the most unnatural idea of the blessed wedding - a man who hasn't spanked the monkey united with a woman that hasn't seen a penis and conceiving that very night. Of course, they'd hang the biblically bloody bedsheets out the window as a sign of faith.

Given this ideal, it is no wonder that most humans fall short and get knocked up. Somehow, teenage pregnancy still happens and often results in the next insult to God...

Abortion
Abortion is a funny topic. Sure, at first ponder it seems quite uncomfortable, but given any sort of analysis it becomes such a no-brainer that you'll wonder what the fuss is about.

Scientifically, there is nothing that would tell us that during the first trimester the fetus has anything more going on than Terry Schiavo.

The argument that abortion causes fetal pain and is therefore cruel doesn't suffice, as to think inflicting any sort of pain is unethical would therefore imply that we all ought to be vegans. Additionally, it is arguably less painful to be aborted than be born to a mother that would abort you.

To say that abortion is wrong as the fetus is a potential human is a completely fallacious argument. Every sperm is a potential human, yet any sane person cannot say we are murderers if we mastrubate, use contraception or choose to be celibate.

Those that would object to the Schiavo reference might say that in the case of Schiavo, her had voiced her wishes before they pulled the plug. In the case of abortion, nobody asks the fetus what it wants. But we also haven't asked any sperm shot against the wall of a shower or into a latex pocket what it thought of its demise.

The kicker in the abortion debate is provided by Christianity.

For in the Bible, it is expressly stated that the aborted will go to Heaven.
2 Corinthians 5:10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.

Deuteronomy 1:39 Moreover your little ones, which ye said should be a prey, and your children, which in that day had no knowledge between good and evil, they shall go in thither, and unto them will I give it, and they shall possess it.
This fits naturally in the "loving God" worldview held by Christian moderates. Why would condemn a sinless fetus to Hell?

The funny thing is, if there is a Heaven, an abortionist will have sent more people there than any priest. If what the abortionist is doing is blasphemy, he or she will burn in Hell while much of their work has since ascended into Heaven.

So what is the Christian issue with abortion? Do Christians not want people to go to Heaven?

The movement so often labelled "pro-life" is not actually promoting quality of life whatsoever. Choosing to have an abortion today could well improve the quality of life of the child to be had in the future. Moreover, "pro-life" in all its incarnations can be said to be anti-contraception and anti-Heaven, unless God is not as merciful as you may think he is...

Polygamy
The Bible supports polygamy.

Even those excerpts that seem to denounce polygamy are shown to be off-base on Christian pro-polygamy websites.

The reasons why polygamy is wrong will not be iterated over here. That is for a future discussion. Just let it be known that the Bible is all for it.

Homosexuality
It's not allowed in the bible. (See above)

Even in the most trendy, moderate Christian websites you will find no defense of homosexual relationships. Homosexuals can be Christian, they say, as long as they refrain from doing all the things that would define them as homosexuals. It can be plainly seen how the church manages to hide its incapacity to be genuine with people behind verbiage and half-truth.

The Celibate Pervert
Within the discussion of the funeral came up the idea of the celibate pervert. Further elaboration on this concept is likely necessary.

The argument spewed around every corner of Abrahamic religion is that homosexuality is abhorrent, unnatural and sinful. Meanwhile, abstinence and celibacy are promoted as virtuous. This is especially apparant in the Catholic church, whose priests are not able to engage in the most normal of sexual relationships.

In nature, we can see the most ridiculous of sexual behaviour in a dog humping a person's leg. This underlines the fact that animals, like humans, will hump anything.

All that should be done is to ensure that the humpee has the capacity and desire to consent to the humping. Beyond this, it is ridiculous to say that any certain sexual behaviour is unnatural. You might find it disgusting, but as is nature.

Given that all normal adult sexual behaviour is prohibited to Catholic priests, it therefore should be no surprise those that take up this line of work tend to only partake in sex that is illegal anyway.

History

Blood on our Godly hands

To those with a knowledge of history becomes readily apparent that Christianity has had a great negative effect on humanity.
  • Moses' Crew Massacre the Midianites
    Numbers 31:1-54 Under God's direction, Moses' army defeats the Midianites. They kill all the adult males, but take the women and children captive. When Moses learns that they left some live, he angrily says: "Have you saved all the women alive? Kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves." So they went back and did as Moses (and presumably God) instructed, killing everyone except for the virgins. In this way they got 32,000 virgins -- Wow! (Even God gets some of the booty - 32 virgins.)

  • The Crusades (1095-1291)
    What was the point? It was a bunch of warfare because Christians coveted a piece of land. Many died for absolutely no reason.

  • The Inquisitions (1100 - 1800)
    Killing and torturing the innocent in the name of God.

  • The Holocaust (1940s)
    Secular schools can never be tolerated because such schools have no religious instruction, and a general moral instruction without a religious foundation is built on air; consequently, all character training and religion must be derived from faith.
    -- Adolf Hitler, 26 April 1933, from a speech made during negotiations leading to the Nazi-Vatican Concordant of 1933.
    The depth of Christian influence on the holocaust is debatable, but is not at all negligible.

    First, where would the views of Hitler be without the widespread antisemitism aided and abetted by Christianity?

    One could say that Hitler was not a Christian even though reading a lot of his speeches show that it largely depends on his mood what his views on religion were.

    Regardless of what Hitler thought, Hitler needed the support of hundreds if not thousands of Christian Europeans. Hint: He didn't round up all the Jews himself.

    Not only did Hitler find an ally in the common Christian, but the Vatican did a good job of closing its eyes.

    Does it surprise anyone that Mel Gibson, the most successful Christian filmmaker, is a rabid anti-semite? Or that his dad is an avid holocaust denier?

    It's easier to make a demon out of a man with a funny mustache than admit to our own sins.

  • Murderous Sodomy Laws (up until 2003)
    The words you are reading owe a lot to both advancement in technology and free exchange of ideas. For those things, we owe a lot to Alan Turing.

    During World War II, Alan Turing was a leading mathematician and cryptographer that played a significant role in breaking the codes of the Enigma machine.

    Not only did he do his part to kick Fascist ass, he went on to greatly advance the field of computing. So much so that computing science's answer to the Nobel Prize is called the Turing Award.

    In 1952, Turing was convicted of sodomy. He lost his job and was placed on hormone treatments in lieu of jailtime. Two years later, Turing killed himself by eating a cyanide laced apple.

    What does this have to do with religion? A better question to ponder would be what religion didn't have to do with Turing's demise.

    The very word sodomy comes directly from the Bible (see Sodom and Gomorrah). On every other page, God is entire cities that he thinks are deviant.

    Naturally, something illegal in the Bible would be illegal today, as the Bible is seen by religious people as the basis of our morality and legal system. You only need to look at all the people that want the ten commandments in every courtroom in the nation.

    Legalization of homosexuality requires ignoring Biblical teachings as well as acts of God. For this reason, it is a wonder why religious people are allowed to benefit from the work of people they condemn.

    If you honestly think that homosexuality ought to be illegal or that dinosaurs were on the ark, turn off your computer.


Loonies and Loose Ends

If you want to criticize Islam...
I quarrel not with far-off foes, but with those who, near at home, co-operate with, and do the bidding of those far away, and without whom the latter would be harmless.
- Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience
It is very fashionable at the moment to criticize Islam. Not only are its extremists murderous, but even more unsettling is that average adherent displays a multitude of mysogynistic qualities.

Those that defend Islam, both in Islamic circles and Christian circles, is that Islam is a "religion of peace" at its core. It is understandable that Christians do this, as the brighter of the bunch realize that saying that Islam preaches hate would be nothing short of blatant hypocrisy.

But why don't we see terrorists and suicide bombers from Buddhism and Jainism? There are assuredly a number of factors that play into extremism of any kind, however it is quite obvious that not all religions are equal in moral teachings.

It's not hard to find theists on either side of the fence argue this fact. Countless words have been written about which religion is nicer and more scientifically true while pointing out inaccuracies in the other.

Debates of theology between the faithful are much like the Special Olympics. Each contestant claims to be wise while the other is retarded. Nobody brings any objective evidence, nobody becomes any smarter, and everyone is especially bored of the dispute.

Jealous, much?
I've been asked occasionally : "How can you dislike a God you don't believe in?"

An atheist can dislike God in the same way you could dislike a character in a novel, play or film. In fact, the Bible is simply a piece of literature that the religious believe is true while the non-religious see it as a mystery how Shakespeare could be a better writer than those inspired by God.

At this point, even if God did irrefutably prove his existence, it would not mean he is worthy of worship. In many cultures in our history, Gods have been mean spirited and downright evil. In the Bible, God is more often than not a malevolent character.

God, time and time again, displays jealousy, anger, narcissism and apathy. God's acts are very disagreeable and clash with my own sense of morality. In this case, it would be the higher ground to be killed than to worship malice.

"There are no atheists in foxholes"
This is a rebuttal to the centuries old idea that atheists simply do not exist. In the 1700s and 1800s, some (obviously theist) philosophers questioned if one could be rational and atheist at the same time. This underlines how far within the bounds of the church popular thought was.

As crazy as it sounds, the idea is retained in the more recent saying - "There are no atheists in foxholes"

The statement surrounds the idea that an atheist ultimately confronts his own mortality - and therefore would be inclined to regress to religion for comfort.

It is very plausible that such an event may happen. But this says more than the person's childhood than it does about god.

In fact, the very existence of wars and foxholes should make us question this nice god's plan. It is absurd that ones would use the consuming despair of one fearing for their lives as some sort of proof of their benevolent security-blanket God.

Will the real believers please stand up?
Human beings are perhaps never more frightening than when they are convinced beyond doubt that they are right.
- Laurens Van der Post, The Lost World of the Kalahari (1958)
I've always wanted to meet a theist with courage enough to believe in his religion.

One that believed he and his friends would undoutably ascend into heaven. One that believed they were doing the work of God.

Oh wait - haven't we seen these people before? Don't they fly planes into buildings and make themselves walking bombs?

Yes. And this illustrates the necessity of atheism.

"But Einstein believed in God"
Actually, no, he didn't. Einstein was a pantheist. This is not Christianity, Islam, or any other anthropomorphized God.

Pantheism is a bunch of bullshit formed to calm theists by using their language.

It is reasonable to suggest that Einstein was aware of this. If you don't believe me, read his own words.
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. The mediocre mind is incapable of understanding the man who refuses to bow blindly to conventional prejudices and chooses instead to express his opinions courageously and honestly.
- Albert Einstein - Letter to Morris Raphael Cohen, professor emeritus of philosophy at the College of the City of New York, defending the appointment of Bertrand Russell to a teaching position (March 19, 1940).

The chief objection I have to pantheism is that it says nothing. To call the world God is not to explain it; it is only to enrich our language with a superfluous synonym for the word "world".
- Arthur Schopenhauer, A Few Words On Pantheism, 1851

Pantheism is sexed-up atheism.
- Richard Dawkins
"But Stalin was an atheist"
Yes, and David Koresh was a Christian.

The Stalin rebuke arises because Christians are often citied as being moral beings by definition. How many times have you heard "a good, God-fearing man" in a sentence?

When hearing an argument against Christianity, the defensive tactic is to find evil people such as Stalin and Mao and come to the conclusion that a communist regime is the endgame for atheism.

Atheists aren't all good people. Atheists aren't all atheists for the right reasons. Atheists aren't all reasonable, kind and logical. Nobody has ever made that claim.

Atheists are just people.

It could even be that evil people are more likely to be atheists, but that does not logically imply that all or even a significant percentage of atheists are evil.

Communism and Christianity have a lot of similarities - they both have no rational basis and they both move to infringe on your liberty. Communism was atheistic in the sense that it replaced God with the party leader. It did not by any means replace God with reason and fair society.

Steven Weinberg said it best: "With or without religion, good people can behave well and bad people can do evil; but for good people to do evil - that takes religion."

Agnosticism is bullshit
"When one admits that nothing is certain one must, I think, also admit that some things are much more nearly certain than others." - Bertrand Russell
Strictly speaking, we all ought to be agnostic when it comes to unprovable claims.

But "I'm an agnostic" is not actually an answer to the question of "Do you believe in God?".

It is a binary choice. You're either a theist in a particular God, in which case you structure your life around that belief, as you would structure your life around any other worldview. The other option is atheism, where the belief in that particular God does not influence your worldview.

Notice how "I don't know and don't care because such things are not provable" is essentially implied atheism, even though you might be uncomfortable with the word.

Let's say I told you there was a teapot orbiting Jupiter that could not be seen with the best telescope. Or that there was an invisible pink unicorn in the room. Or that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster.

About all these subjects, you would have to be agnostic. You couldn't prove me wrong. But you also wouldn't believe my bullshit, and the intellectually honest would go to great lengths to show how incredibly improbable my claims are.

When one says "I'm agnostic", replace this with "I think beliefs in things that are horrendously improbable have enough merit to not be honestly questioned".

After one has positively identified themselves as "agnostic", make the claim that Hitler, Stalin and George Bush are actually incarnations of God in human form.

If the "agnostic" has any objections to this at all, indeed any decent individual would say this is absurd, simply state the truth that Yahweh and Allah are no more provable than HitlerStalinBushGod. The "Agnostic" at this point would have voiced their opinion that there is no HitlerStalinBushGod, meaning that they make special concessions to people coming from the popular monotheisms.

End the conversation by telling the ignorant "agnostic" to go fuck themselves.

As it has been said so many times before - Let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains fall out.

SETI - Search for Evidence That we are Ignorant
"If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little." - George Carlin
In reality SETI is the Search for Exterrestrial Intelligence. SETI spends most of it days listening to alien ratio stations, that happen to sound like a heck of a lot of static at the moment.

Where do you think religion would be if SETI actually found aliens?

I know how First Contact will go down. After all the translation and initial connection is made, the question of God will inevitably come up:

Aliens : "We are so happy to have made contact! May Buijguinologo bless you!"

Earth : "Buijguinologo?"

Aliens : "You mean you don't believe in Buijguinologo?"

Earth : "Actually there was this Jesus guy..... on second thought forget it. What flavours of icecream do you guys have?"
Respect your beliefs?
No. Never will.

You believe, at best, that I will deservedly burn in hell for innocuous choices I make every day. At worst, you believe that I ought to be jailed so my time on Earth is punishment as well.

To respect someone else's belief that you will burn eternally is akin to respecting someone's belief that you should be tortured and killed.

It's surprising that sermons given Sunday are not denounced as hate speech, let alone deserving some sort of respect by our society.

Oh well, it's not easy being an apostate. But here's the big secret:

ATHEISM SUCKS
... but at least we can admit it
The entirety of atheism is contained in this response. Atheism is not a philosophy; it is not even a view of the world; it is simply an admission of the obvious. In fact, "atheism" is a term that should not even exist.

No one ever needs to identify himself as a "non-astrologer" or a "non-alchemist." We do not have words for people who doubt that Elvis is still alive or that aliens have traversed the galaxy only to molest ranchers and their cattle.

Atheism is nothing more than the noises reasonable people make in the presence of unjustified religious beliefs.

An atheist is simply a person who believes that the 260 million Americans (87 percent of the population) claiming to "never doubt the existence of God" should be obliged to present evidence for his existence—and, indeed, for his benevolence, given the relentless destruction of innocent human beings we witness in the world each day.

An atheist is a person who believes that the murder of a single little girl—even once in a million years— casts doubt upon the idea of a benevolent God.

- Sam Harris

The Good



Douglas Adams
This is rather as if you imagine a puddle waking up one morning and thinking, ‘This is an interesting world I find myself in—an interesting hole I find myself in—fits me rather neatly, doesn’t it? In fact it fits me staggeringly well, must have been made to have me in it!’ This is such a powerful idea that as the sun rises in the sky and the air heats up and as, gradually, the puddle gets smaller and smaller, it’s still frantically hanging on to the notion that everything’s going to be alright, because this world was meant to have him in it, was built to have him in it; so the moment he disappears catches him rather by surprise. I think this may be something we need to be on the watch out for.


Epicurus (341 BCE - 270 BCE)
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
...Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing?
...Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing?
...Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing?
...Then why call him God?


Thomas Paine
I view things as they are, without regard to place or person; my country is the world, and my religion is to do good.


Thomas Jefferson
I never submitted the whole system of my opinions to the creed of any party of men whatever in religion, in philosophy, in politics, or in anything else where I was capable of thinking for myself. Such an addiction is the last degradation of a free and moral agent.

The Bad



Joseph Stalin
Responsible for the deaths of countless people.


Chairman Mao
Big kahuna of the People's Republic of China


Enver Hoxha
Leader of Albania, friend of Mother Teresa.


Elton John
Nearly killed us all with the horrendously overplayed Candle in the Wind.
The list continues endlessly. Your baker, your mailman, a coworker and even your pastor may not believe in your rendition of God but somehow they haven't slit your throat yet. This simple fact proves that your sense of morality transcends all religious dogma and exists within you. It is either nurtured to create a moral being, or neglected to create a selfish, psychopathic individual.

There is not fast and easy answer to questions of morality and the universe. As a species, we are stumped by the simplest of mathematical proofs. How could we be expected to know the origins of the universe and what a supreme being wants of us?

The answers do not lie in centuries old books just as they do not lie in new-age self-help fads. The questions of life aren't answered in pages X through Y of a general self help manual.

It's up to you.

Comments...

Leo - Recommendations

If you liked this novel by Sheldong, you may also like:
War and Peace by Tolstoy,
The Iliad by Homer,
and the Bible by Jebus

Merriman -

You have far too much time on your hands.

sheldong - forever since last post

It's been forever since my last post.

I had to produce SOMETHING!

By the way, posting links should work better now, and visitors can subscribe to the RSS feed.

Dan - wow

I don't know where to start, especially when I can't even read the whole thing in one sitting

Brian - second the wow

so its long. very long. Are you looking into publishers?

Oh I may be coming to Van this weekend though. I'll keep you posted.

First impressions though.

I agree that agnosticism is rather lame. I think it should be reserved for a transitory state when people are still making up their minds. But heck grow some balls and make a choice for crying out loud. It's like the people at starbucks that take 15 minutes to decided what kind of coffee to order.

I also think it is interesting that you paint atheistic philosphers in such an amazing light and leave religious philosophers out of the equation. Sure it may be easy to dismantle the thoughts of people who wrote their stuff a couple of centuries ago, but their have been more recent authors as well.

I would also object to the statement that religious individuals avoid reading aethist philosophers. Some of the Christians that I respect the most have read and actually recommend to me aethist readings.

It is of no use to analyse only one side of an argument. This is true from a theist or atheist point of view.

Overall its a good rant but I think you should post shorter snippets more often.

Merriman -

Nice to see that porn messages and Viagra advertisements follow sheldong like that nasty case of clamp follows me.

... but that's another story.

Oh look! I can make my Pen15 bigger 2day!

w0p - holy crap

that was the longest rant ever. I couldn't even read the whole thing. Keep it shorter Dong you'll attract more readers.

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Previous Episodes...

105. A Reasonable Doubt

Nothing is wrong with Thomas. (101 Comments)

104. Critique of Christianity

Does it live up to its marketing? (19 Comments)

103. Church Crawl Conclusions

Churches compared. (3 Comments)

102. Church Crawl - Part 8: Christian Science

God can heal your cancer. If he wants. (0 Comments)

101. Church Crawl - Part 7: The Christadelphians

Taking the Bible very seriously. (2 Comments)

100. Church Crawl - Part 6: The Quakers

Not just about oatmeal. (3 Comments)

99. Don't Marry

Please just get a pet. (11 Comments)

98. The Church State

The government may be the most popular church. (9 Comments)

97. Gun Registry Retardation

License to burn money. (9 Comments)

96. War and Pretend Peace

Dogs playing poker with Chamberlain. (7 Comments)

95. The Rules of Sex

Extremely easy to follow instructions. (5 Comments)

94. Church Crawl - Part 5: The United Church

Everybody likes projectors! (15 Comments)

93. Kyoto Krap and Peak Oil Poppycock

Change is coming, but it won't be doomsday. (20 Comments)

92. How to Communicate

Or how not to communicate. (5 Comments)

91. Don't Hate Microsoft

In defense of Windows. (4 Comments)

90. Church Crawl - Part 4: The Presbyterian Church

Church in the House of Commons. (3 Comments)

89. The Failures of Instant Messaging

When we could do without IM. (20 Comments)

88. Wonderful Wikipedia

All hail our wiki god. (12 Comments)

87. Church Crawl - Part 3: The Lutheran Church

Intense. (2 Comments)

86. Church Crawl - Part 2: The Anglican Church

Like the Catholics, but not. (17 Comments)

85. Church Crawl - Part 1: Seventh Day Adventist

Let's go to church on a Saturday! (6 Comments)

84. Mundane Multiculturalism

It will be the end of us. (7 Comments)

83. Firefox's Secret Feature

Well, not so secret. But very cool, use it already. (3 Comments)

82. Stuporheroes

Let's face it. Superman sucks. (13 Comments)

81. The Culture Club!

Back in town. (4 Comments)

80. The Case for the Conservatives

End of the Reds, for the time being? (31 Comments)

79. Much Ado About IT

I like my red stapler. (15 Comments)

78. I think, therefore I am an idiot

How to offend people and make enemies. (10 Comments)

77. The End of the Line

Evolution stops here. (5 Comments)

76. The Insanity Plea

Just who is sane, anyways? (12 Comments)

75. Life Crash

The world exploded. (6 Comments)

74. How HP ruined my day

Hewlett can go screw himself. (6 Comments)

73. The Dumbest Thing I've done ...this week

Shame! Shame! (1 Comments)

72. The Best Sci-Fi Shows of All Time

There is such a thing as a bad sci-fi show, unfortunately. (7 Comments)

71. Drinking for the Less Fortunate

Boozing for a good cause! (10 Comments)

70. Outsourcing

Why you shouldn't worry so much. (15 Comments)

69. Handkerchiefs

Your nose's best friend. (4 Comments)

68. The Quality of Information

Where the internet fails us. (11 Comments)

67. anonymous would-be-parent asks "Guru, where do babies come from?"

The jury is still out. (17 Comments)

66. The Osama Factory

Do we manufacture nutbars? (12 Comments)

65. The Greatest Video Games of All Time

Well, at least to date. (3 Comments)

64. Life in the Asylum

The epic journey back to prison. (6 Comments)

63. Our Beloved Belinda and Racial Profiling

Politics and allegations of racism. (5 Comments)

62. Rights and Freedoms

Do they exist? (18 Comments)

61. Relationships

Don't have to be difficult. (17 Comments)

60. PowerPoint Evangelism and Written Evaluations

The evils of presentations. (5 Comments)

59. Greatest Canadians

How awesome are Canucks? (9 Comments)

58. What to do with all these 486's?

The most useless computers on earth. (4 Comments)

57. anonymous asks "guru, if you could pick, which one would you take: doris day, grace kelly, marilyn monroe?"

Damn, tough question. (0 Comments)

56. anonymous girl asks "Guru, why do boys smell the way they do?"

The evolution of funk. (0 Comments)

55. anonymous german asks "ever wore anything other than a white shirt?"

Is it a religious thing? (1 Comments)

54. Nifty File Browsing

I like pie. (10 Comments)

53. Ann Coulter is not Right Wing

She's simply retarded. (6 Comments)

52. John Mayer is a knob

Kick him in the junk. (17 Comments)

51. Retirement is for quitters

Why a sweater-vest may be bad for your health. (11 Comments)

50. Cleansing

Getting rid of those toxins. (5 Comments)

49. Why your 'Life sucks'

Quit being so grouchy. (13 Comments)

48. Ultimate Weight Loss Solution!

Crazy about weight? Simple one step program. (10 Comments)

47. Vegetables and Euthanasia

A bullet for Terry. (17 Comments)

46. The Problem with Icons

Modern hieroglyphs for morons. (3 Comments)

45. Tabs are awesome

Whatever would we do without the tab key? (9 Comments)

44. The Abortion Circus

Where all the clowns are. (43 Comments)

43. The Most Painful Experience in my Life

A tragic tale. (3 Comments)

42. Marijuana

What to do, what to do. (11 Comments)

41. Missile Defense

Missles for MADness. (1 Comments)

40. Ranting

Rant! Rant rant rant! (1 Comments)

39. Terry Fox and the Queen

If only one could be on a coin, which would it be? (1 Comments)

38. Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Martin!

Fun with image editors. (0 Comments)

37. Feminism

The good, the bad, and the ugly. (2 Comments)

36. Finding the right person

A mirror works well. (0 Comments)

35. Separatism

How annoying can the French and British be? (1 Comments)

34. Religion

Would our insanity surface elsewhere? (1 Comments)

33. The Science of Urinals

The formulae of etiquette. (0 Comments)

32. The Last Bastion of Sanity

This article is more rant than rationality. It is the result of inebriation. (1 Comments)

31. The Desktop is stupid.

A dying metaphor needs to be put out of its misery. (0 Comments)

30. Stupid Language

Blah, Blah, Blah. Gender neutral is bullshit! (0 Comments)

29. Karate Championship

Don't fuck with this! (0 Comments)

28. The Mind

We're all nuts. (1 Comments)

27. The Dvorak Keyboard and the Inconvenience of Diversity

The drag of diversity. (1 Comments)

26. Another Casual Update

Likely written in underwear. (1 Comments)

25. Time Revisited

More about clocks. (0 Comments)

24. Marriage is Gay!

Very gay. (3 Comments)

23. Pyjamas and Housecoats

The definition of awesomeness. (0 Comments)

22. Ego

Your own personal Jesus. (1 Comments)

21. The 24 Hour Clock

Why the world should switch. (2 Comments)

20. Maturity

Do people age well? (0 Comments)

19. The Ethernet Battle

Man versus technology. (0 Comments)

18. Latex, Savior of Humanity.

In honour of rubbers. (0 Comments)

17. Tolerance and Political Correctness

Tolerance is bullshit. (1 Comments)

16. iVomit

The sickness of the Apple brand. (2 Comments)

15. Homophobia

Gays are cool. (0 Comments)

14. Randomness Revisited

Still isn't real. (2 Comments)

13. Political Quiz

The exercize in stupidity. (1 Comments)

12. Relativity

The evils of celebrity worship. (1 Comments)

11. Back in the Salmon Again

Eggnog! (0 Comments)

10. The Casual Update

Not incredibly important. (1 Comments)

9. Edumacated

The ill-effects of schooling. (4 Comments)

8. Randomness

Isn't real. Really. (1 Comments)

7. Centibots Revisited

Little robots to rule the earth! (9 Comments)

6. Mars

Would we go insane trying? (0 Comments)

5. Psychic

The future is boring. (0 Comments)

4. I, Random

Random rantings. (14 Comments)

3. How's it going?

Not so good. (21 Comments)

2. Nanobots

Nanobots are cool. But where is the inbetween? (2 Comments)

1. Page up.

The madness begins... (4 Comments)

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